My Child is in a Testing Phase

...Bring on the booze.  Okay, not really.  But really.

I meant to write earlier than this, but it has been a rough couple of weeks, and blogging got left a bit by the wayside.  Apologies.

I actually have a couple posts in mind to write, but at this exact moment, my brain is on fuzzed-out mode, and needs to kind of rant.  Double apologies.

So, as you can tell, things have been pretty stressful - life is pretty busy right now, which always adds to the stress, but the main reason for the crazy is that we are in full-blown testing phase purgatory right now.  Gabe, like all little kids, goes through definitive periods of time which we like to call 'testing phases', which basically means that he pushes and pushes and argues and does things he knows he isn't supposed to and drives us bananas for anywhere from a few days to a few weeks.  AKA acts like a huge butt.  (That's the technical definition).  It's is super frustrating because I know how he is capable of acting, and I also know that this is totally normal, kids toeing the line, feeling out boundaries, discovering a sense of self, that his opinions are his own ...but it essentially boils down to 'he wants what he wants right now and nothing will deter him'.  We used to be able to offer choices...if he wanted to do something he wasn't allowed to do, we would offer a few other choices and he would pick one.  Now it's nothing but "NO, I don't want any of those!" and whining and crying and yelling...super fun times for all.  He also tries to find loopholes, or manipulate his way out of things, which, while clever and impressive, is hugely annoying when you are, for example, trying to punish him.  Sigh.

One of the upshots of this is a stubborn refusal to cooperate with most things.  Including answering questions.  Now granted, Gabe has never been the best question answerer...he refuses to 'perform' on cue...which is fine, who likes to play monkey, really?  But when it's things like "Hey Gabe, what did you do at school day?" and it's like pulling teeth to get even one or two things that he did, because he 'just doesn't want to tell you that'...it can get pretty damn frustrating.  Clearly, this only gets worse during testing phases.  But now we are reconsidering the IQ test at this point...I know that having a professional asking the questions, and someone he doesn't know already might make a difference, but I can totally see him just being like 'I just don't want to answer that' to the psychologist...and that would be bad. But we are just riding it out to see how things go...we have another month before we have to make any decisions.  It's just...draining, you know?  But it never hurts to take a step back.

If anyone has any advice for how to deal with super smart, manipulative, whiny almost-4 year olds...leave a comment.  We can use all the help we can get!

I feel like I need to say that while the testing phase really sucks, it is by no means all the time, every day. Gabe is still his sweet, kind, curious self a lot of the time...it's just when he's NOT, that it's like,  "woah there, kid, chill yourself."

Tangent Alert!!  Gabe's mental math calculations are just getting so crazy good.  Like, he will often arrive at an answer faster than I do.  (Granted, I am not the best mental calculator, but still...)  And he plays with big numbers, adding two sets of 3 digit numbers, with regrouping (ie. 485 +856 or whatever).  He has also been big into squares, cubes and the like.  Oh and reducing fractions.  It's pretty magnificent, especially when you know that he isn't drilling any of this, it's just...there.  In his head.  I don't know how he holds that kind of information, especially for the calculation stuff...he must be so visual to be able to manipulate the numbers mentally like that.  And he definitely tried to eat my nose the other day, so there's that.

Since this post was a bit ranty, I'll end with some good news.  Jules just turned 9 months, and is right on the verge of walking.  He can stand up on his own, and take a step or two before falling on his butt.  It's pretty adorable.  Also, he has discovered 'people food' and has since become a bottomless pit for things like toast, fruit and pancakes ;).

So yeah, totally the most cohesive post ever.  Not impressive.  I promise I will do my best to be less divergent in the future. 

Until next time,

Marnie